There was a time… There was a time when world around was simpler and more beautiful. Unfortunately, it seems that the world has changed while remaining static. There was a time when I was in Kindergarten and cried the hell out during an exam just because I just ‘didn’t feel like’ writing the exam. I forced the teachers to call my mother (our home was a two minutes walk away). As she stood outside the class, I forced her to come inside in the exam time, held her hand tight and said…
“Haan… Likhiye… Likhiye na… Main bol raha hoon, aap likhiye… (Ya… Write… Write no… Write as I say)”
“Tum likho na… Exam hai… main kaise likhoongi? (You write… It’s an exam dear… I am not supposed to write in the exam)”
“Uff!! Mera haath dard kar raha hai… Aap likhiye… Likhiye… A… P… P… L… E… Likhiye na… Dekh kya rahe hain? (Uff! My hands are aching… You write… Write… A… P… P… L… E… Write no… Why are you looking at me?)”
Those were some moments that shall be cherished forever. Once I declared that elephant is a bird… Well not my fault… An animated cartoon series showed a flying elephant… and as we all know… ‘Anything that flies is a bird’ and so elephant – which flew – was a bird… Simple! 🙂
Another instance which I remember was when our school teachers gave us homework to ‘write all the English alphabets five times each without looking (bina dekhe)‘. Now the ‘without looking’ meant not to turn overleaf where the alphabets were already written (as classwork) and write them out of memory. But being a very ‘obedient’ kid in the class, I took the words ‘without looking’ literally and there you go… I sit on my bed, with my eyes towards the ceiling, probably closed, trying to write the English alphabets five times each in my ‘four-lined note book’ (I hope you remember them… Don’t you?)
And today in my hostel room, I recall those memories. Golden days. Days which define a natural, carefree, unrestricted life. One in which words like personal, private, ego, deceit and dishonesty don’t crop up. There was nothing to hide back then. When happy, we would laugh our hearts out, when sad we would cry as if hell has broken loose, and when angry we would swear never to talk to that person again at his face.
Those were the days… Today when happy, we no longer laugh, we are grown-ups, we smile; when sad, we no longer cry aloud, we are grown-ups, we sob silently inside a pillow; and when angry at someone, we no longer shout off at his face, we are grown-ups, we remain silent, let the anger grow and ultimately seek revenge.
Oh we do a lot more as grown-ups. We start having our personal lives (oh god… I hate this word so badly). We make a point not to intrude into ones personal space (you see, the same thing has two names) and get outraged if someone breaches our privacy (now it has three names).
But yet in this grown-up world we try to preserve our childhood via friends. Well my definition of friends is a very strict one… Friends… a group of people where ‘good morning’ or any general salutation is replaced by… well… you know what. A group of people who fight so hard that they forget that they are friends. A group of people who care about each other in ways unspeakable, who share joys in ways indescribable, who share tears in ways inaudible.
I have always been extremely selective about friends. But yes, I do make friends, the real good friends. But sometimes… just sometimes big words like ‘personal space’, ‘personal life’, ‘privacy’ seem to mist the transparent air around. Those times, I seem to loose my childhood, I seem to loose my power to make friends – real friends; and in those times I write…
March 7, 2014 at 11:59 am
My commiserations to you for writing this Arindam 😉
I was a bit surprised to learn you were put under exam pressure in kindergarten.
When I was in kinda the most challenging thing we were expected to do was keep quiet in class, sit cross legged on mats on the floor and put our hands on our heads. It was all about teaching school discipline, academic teaching didn’t come into it. We didn’t even start learning the alphabet until first class (I was pretty disappointed I can tell you. I expected to be learning algebra and physics from day one).
I only started a blog because there’s no-one in my life interested in most of the things I want to talk about. I had that problem when I was young too, only there was no social media in the 1960s, so I kept notebooks. The problem with that is that when you’re that age the things you wrote as little as six months ago seem silly and immature. I burned a lot of notebooks. I guess in cyberspace there’s no outrunning your immaturity. Or your ‘maturity’.
March 10, 2014 at 7:42 pm
Well… Schooling in India is very ‘tough’ I guess. We have so very trained in giving exams that… well… at the age of 21, we feel exam day to be yet another day of the course…
Realizing that the writings 6 months ago is immature is an indicator of one’s growing maturity. If they don’t seen immature, it means your maturity is stagnant…
March 10, 2014 at 8:10 pm
… or that you have matured beyond the point of judging things according to such an arbitrary measure as ‘maturity’.
March 10, 2014 at 9:28 pm
Agreed!
March 7, 2014 at 11:02 pm
Yes..i feel precisely the same way..my friend..:)
and i never give up on people i call friends….
or leave their side.
March 10, 2014 at 8:05 pm
🙂 Thank you… friend
March 7, 2014 at 11:05 pm
And no tHere is no thing private about..
me..
i share IS ALL
March 10, 2014 at 8:08 pm
Glad to know!
March 8, 2014 at 4:17 am
Such a mamma’s boy! 😉 but very cute though.
March 10, 2014 at 9:01 pm
Confused…
March 8, 2014 at 8:40 am
this is an amazing story Arindam, very beautiful. We were luckier, the school in which I first went, allowed all my siblings to take admission in class fourth, I was the only one in our gang who has taken admission in class three.
honestly i absolutely hate it when i see those tiny kids crying their heads off as they are being dragged to school or inside school away from mother.
childhood should be happy… but who will listen to such rubbish in this cat eats the cat world, where kids have to be “trained” from day 1 if possible…
I love my pre school days, and I love the hunger it created for school, i was so glad when i was finally allowed to go to school
March 10, 2014 at 9:06 pm
Pre-school days…. That is another box full of memories… 🙂 Thanks for the comments
March 26, 2014 at 9:27 am
mine were quite long, i enjoyed them till six or seven years of age 🙂
They were real fun!
March 8, 2014 at 4:22 pm
accha…. elephant can fly… good one :)… You know the problem with growing up is that we think that we are grown ups when we are not… school, as people say is the most cherished times of their lives (although there are exceptions like me), has an important constructive role to play and friends act as a catalyst to help us in constructing ourselves… And knowing that you are selective about your friends… I am honoured to be ur friend 😛
March 10, 2014 at 9:14 pm
You see… that particular elephant could fly… So you shouldn’t blame me for the ‘wrong’ conclusion 😉 🙂
Schools not the most cherished for you? Great… we have at least something in common 😉
And to be very truthful, I am truly honoured to have you as a friend… 🙂 Agle post mein logic padh liyo 🙂
March 11, 2014 at 6:26 pm
When did I blamed you?? i just appreciated that it’s a good observation
School not the most cherished… tere liye bhi nahi?? tere saath kya pange hue the??
And yes u are roght… you are honoured to have me as a friend 😛 😉
March 9, 2014 at 10:18 pm
Hahaha, You must have been such a cutie when you were little. Don’t know about now though 😛
Aah, you took me to such a memory lane, those carefree days, with no worries, everything so simple, everything straight forward. When we grow up life adds different dimensions to it which makes it much more confusing and difficult. Everything was rightly said by you.
And by the way loved the last paragraph the most, you ended it perfectly Arindam !
March 10, 2014 at 9:27 pm
🙂 Thanks… Umm… Aaa… Thanks Lifeconfusions…. for the comment… And special thanks for complimenting the last paragraph… 🙂
March 11, 2014 at 12:32 am
Hahaha, Don’t know what to say, huh? Happens its okay 😉
You are most welcome Arindam, I loved the article is all ! 🙂
March 11, 2014 at 6:25 am
I know what to say… I just got stuck at your name… As usual… 😐 And what a pen-name too… So natural, so inspiring… Huh! 😉
March 11, 2014 at 5:54 pm
Hahaha, by Pen-name you mean Life Confusions?
March 11, 2014 at 6:34 pm
Yup…
March 11, 2014 at 9:09 pm
Khair ye inspiring to nahe hy, bus life ky confusing moment me ye blog bnaya to is liay ye naam rakh deya ! 🙂
March 13, 2014 at 4:23 am
Aye. What a cute, innocent description at the beginning. 😀 Honestly speaking, in my days, I hated kids who cried and called for their parents. 😛 I was always the one to finish the classwork and exams first in the row, and being the class ‘monitor’, I punished hard those kids who tried to be so cheesy. xD
Best days ever. 🙂
I’m glad you wrote this article. It brought back a LOT of memories. :’)
By the way, I still laugh like crazy, and cry like crazy, and I still discuss ‘personal life’ with complete strangers. Guess I ain’t gonna grow up very soon. 😀
March 30, 2014 at 11:49 pm
O Teri! Main to darr gaya… achchha hua aap meri class monitor nahain thin… Waise… I was expelled from my school in the first year of schooling due to excessive crying… 😛 😐
Achchha hai… One must not grow up ever… 🙂
March 31, 2014 at 7:26 am
LOL Being the class monitor taught me so many things. The most benevolent lesson of all: How to punch a guy in the face and be justified. 😀
To this day, I do not hesitate to find myself in situations where I can actually punch people for being rude to me, regardless of their age and gender. It’s not very womanly but oh well. 😀
One must not, but one has to, and that my friend, is the tragedy of life. 😦
March 31, 2014 at 7:52 am
Gandi Bachchi… Ladkon ko nahin maarte….
“Men are to be respected… unki har baat maana karo… daanten to daant sun liya karo… and ulte jawaab nhin diya karo… Samjhi?”
Ye sab bhool gayin? Agar aapka jawaab hai haan to SMS karen “WAAI EEE ESS… YES to 57575” Aur agar aapka jawaab hai nahin to… ye sab bhoolne ki koshish karen 🙂 😉
But seriously girl… WWell done by punching a guy in the face… Uska mazaa hi alad hota hai na? 😛
March 31, 2014 at 1:16 pm
Alaa hota tha, tab. 😀 I mean, okay, so this guy told me ‘You’re so fat, you don’t deserve to be the monitor’. And he made fun of my bob hair cut. So yeah, he had to be punched. I made his nose bleed, serves him right. 😀
Actually I detest mankind. Leiken for people who deserve respect in general, I am all up for showing them what they deserve. 😉
March 31, 2014 at 10:32 pm
Agreed – that guy needed to be punched… Aap moti to ho hi nahin saktin 🙂 😛
You ‘detest’ mankind? Kyun yaar?
And people like me… do they deserve ‘some’ respect? 🙂 😛 😉 😉
April 1, 2014 at 8:18 pm
Lol At that time, It wasn’t about being fat or being thin. It was about ‘How dare you?!’ 😛
Loads of reasons. People are treacherous, they lie in your face, they are backstabbers and they will destroy everything you love just because they are jealous.
Haan na. I have an exception to the rule. ^_^ People who write are people who need to voice something, and that makes them ones who have immensely suffered, or are people who have the most wonderful ideas contained within them. 😉
April 3, 2014 at 5:36 pm
Waise… people are also good… hai na? Basically people have variety… And anything that has variety can’t be ‘detested’… can it?
Itna confusing likha ki mera chhota so dimag confuse ho gaya… I guess you meant to say yes?
April 4, 2014 at 3:53 am
I don’t know. I mean, I just don’t understand it fully (yet) and that is the major reason for the clouding misanthropy in my mind.
But here’s something, once bitten, twice shy. And of all the people I have known (like those who have practically existed around me), have proven to be distrustful and dishonest. And I do know a LOT of people, given my social skills, so yeah, statistically speaking, if there’s a situation where I have to choose between working with or without people, I’m better off alone.
LOL Amplify that level of obscurity to a thousand times and you will know what goes on in my mind. 😀
April 30, 2014 at 4:51 pm
It’s never made sense to me when someone says “people are good” or “people are bad”. How the heck is a person supposed to stand outside humanity to make such a judgement?
If you do it by reference to, say, a book you believe to be inspired by gods rather than people, you are in even deeper trouble because you are not only judging god’s creation but implicitly judging god’s own standard of good and evil against your own. I seem to recall Arjuna copping a bit of a scolding for doing that.
My own depression only ended when I saw the hypocrisy imbedded in my own concept of morality and my moral code immediately collapsed.
You can’t really look down on others without inevitably coming to look down on yourself (or is it the other way around?). Perfectionism arises from the misapprehension that everything isn’t already perfect.
June 1, 2014 at 10:01 am
Oh very cool yar..
kya lekha hey,aap ney muje b apne k.g classes ke din yad dila dye.JAb mey kindergarten mey thi tho buhut roti thi,teachers ko gusey sey dekti thi q k wo homework dety theyh but today we really miss those days a lot…..But days when once gone,,,,never come back….
You have picked a very interesting title and the post is as usual very good..But you people have disappeared on my blog yar..So long i haven’t seen your comments aur wo lalrukh tho buhut magroor ho gai hey 😛
Anyways,,,,i liked the post so much… 🙂
June 1, 2014 at 10:17 am
Sorry sorry sorry… 😦 Kal aapka post dekh tha… socha that comment karunga but phir kaam ke chakkar mein bhool gaya. 😦 Sorry yaar aaj kal kaafi busy rehta hoon… Dekhiye na… likhne ka bhi time ni milta… Aur… Maria ke exams chal rahe hain… And… Lala… well… ab main kya bolun… 😛 (waise ‘magroor’ ka meaning search karna padaa… :P)
June 1, 2014 at 10:18 am
hahah doesn’t matter par ita busy,well i thought k friendship tho khatam hochuka hey ap logonh ka mujh sey…
June 1, 2014 at 10:20 am
🙂 Aise thodi na friendship khatam hoti hai… Baat karti hain aap bhi… 😛
Kaisi hain?
June 1, 2014 at 10:22 am
hhaha acha tho teek hai..
i am fine ap sunao..Results agae ap k?
June 1, 2014 at 10:23 am
Ji aa gaye… bahut achchhe the 🙂
Aaj kal germany mein hoon 2 mahine ke liye
June 1, 2014 at 10:25 am
Ooooh Congrats…
hamerey results tho pending hain,,abi tak out nai hoe hain,,expected on the first week of june 😦
Enjoy in Germany
June 1, 2014 at 10:51 am
Mast result aayegaa aapka bhi 🙂 fikar not 🙂
June 1, 2014 at 10:52 am
O.k lets hope for the best 🙂
June 1, 2014 at 10:50 am
kahan chaley gae??
June 1, 2014 at 10:52 am
Yo papa mummy se baat kar raha tha skype pe… 🙂
June 1, 2014 at 10:53 am
Acha…O.k
June 5, 2014 at 2:55 pm
Being grown up sucks ! It really do. Your post made everyone think about their childhood lol I never went to kindergarten… My first class was nursery and we learnt abc and counting their. I was intelligent and kind of book worm till fifth grade, when my habits started changing. Loved reading about your innocent incidents I wish I could recall some of mine too but I can’t.
June 6, 2014 at 10:35 am
🙂 Thanks a lot… Waise… you went to nursery and but did not go to kindergarten? Kaise? I thought nursery ke baad kindergarten aataa hai…
And you can’t recall your child incidences? Koi na yaar… Mere hi padh lo… Sabke ek jaise hi hote hain… Appke bhi aise hi hote honge… bachpan mein 🙂
June 7, 2014 at 11:05 am
No hamaray haan, Nursery k baad prep class ati hai and then first, second, third, so on…
Lol yeah I guess meray bhi kuch aisay he hun gay Except that I was kinda shy and silent kid so I can expect some variations too 😉
June 7, 2014 at 11:29 am
Oh… You were a silent kid? I was expelled from school in Nursery for excessive crying 😛 😉
June 7, 2014 at 2:22 pm
Lol I never cried for going to school or studying, that’s what my mom tells me 😛
July 3, 2015 at 12:04 am
Awww. Golden childhood memories. I loved the one about writing without seeing. Funny and cute 🙂
Being a grown up not much fun coz people expect you to act your age but I say people talk do what you want and enjoy it while living.